20 Things I have learned after 4 months of not drinking alcohol

I can’t believe it has been 4 months since I made the monumental decision to stop drinking alcohol forever.

For over twenty years I had drank red wine pretty much every day, usually a bottle a night, sometimes often more. As the years went by my dependency got worse and it started to dawn on me that alcohol had a pretty tight grip on my life.

I used to like to think I was in control and I could stop whenever I wanted, how wrong I was, deep down I knew the truth.

Thankfully I managed to break free and in July 2018 I put the bottle down for good, I have not touched a drop of alcohol since and I never will again.

It was hard at first, but as the weeks rolled by it became easier, in fact it became fun and I started to love the experience of being sober.

So what have I learned from four months of not drinking alcohol?

1. I have learned that my awful anxiety was caused by drinking wine, a few weeks after I stopped drinking my anxiety faded away and has been at ‘normal’ levels ever since.
2. I have learned what waking up refreshed after a restful nights sleep feels like. There I was thinking alcohol helped me sleep, it might have knocked me out but there was no restful sleeping, no wonder my eyes used to be dark and I felt tired all the time when I was drinking.
3. I have learned how to find peace, for the first time in a long time I feel a sense of peace and calm in my life. Probably because my day no longer revolves around wine o’clock.
4. I have learned to be grateful and thankful for the gift of sobriety and all the wonderful people and things I have in my life.
5. I have learned that there are loads of amazing alcohol-free drinks and I love them! Ceders, Seedlip, Tonic Water, GinSin, lovely!
6. I have learned that my tongue is actually pink, not dark purple (now the red wine stains have gone).
7. I have learned to relax when I am driving on the school run in the morning, I am not over the drink-drive limit.
8. I have learned that I can still laugh and have fun without alcohol inside me, I used to think I needed wine to have fun but these days I laugh more than ever.
9. I have learned that thousands of people are struggling with their own relationship with alcohol, the growth of the Be Sober private Facebook group has been incredible and gives me a clear insight into the number of people who want to make a change.
10. I have learned that some of my friends have a problem with their own relationship with alcohol, a couple of them have even joined the Be Sober Facebook group, well done to you guys for taking a positive step.
11. I have learned that people on the sober-journey are among the most caring, compassionate and non-judgmental people you could ever know.
12. I have learned why my face was bloated and blotchy, it isn’t now.
13. I have learned that I can have fun going out sober and how much I enjoy driving home (and getting into bed) after a night out.
14. I have learned that a night out is fun regardless of alcohol, if it is a boring event it is still boring whether you are drinking or not, the alcohol makes no difference.
15. I have learned to look out for other people, since I have been sober I have started doing community work helping local vulnerable people and also work on my blog and Facebook group every day. Giving back feels good and gives me a sense of purpose. Hm, I can feel another blog post coming on entitled ‘do I give back to help other people, or to help myself’, both I think…
16. I have learned not to judge, everyone has a different story and everyone needs support and help to make their way on the sober-journey.
17. I have learned to care less about money, it used to be pretty much all that motivated me (along with making sure I had a supply of red wine). Now I don’t care so much about it, so long as I am comfortable I am fine, I am more interested in being happy, sober and feeling a sense of peace and calm.
18. I have learned to enjoy family time again, wine took this away from me and made me argue and be snappy with my son. Since I quit drinking our relationship has grown stronger than ever and I enjoy spending time together and going out and about as a family so much more than when I was drinking.
19. I have learned that not everyone will be as excited about the joy of sobriety as I am, in fact, I have discovered a few friendships were based mainly around alcohol and have ended up having question them.
20. I have learned that my close family and true friends are supportive and proud of what I have achieved. I also learned that most of them didn’t realise I had a problem with alcohol.

Watch my talk at This Naked Mind Live in Denver, Colorado – Three things I learned when I quit drinking alcohol